The Contrarian- My Friends all call me a Contrarian. It’s not that I like to argue, its just that everyone else is wrong. Check in on this recurring column to find out what I will disagree on but be right about next.
Don’t think you are going to be able to get a cup of decent coffee theses days without fighting through a bunch of tight-jeaned-vintage-clothes-wearing-big-bearded-commie-freaking-Hipsters. What the hell is a Hipster anyways? Seems like the first rule of being a hispter is not identifying yourself as one in the first place (which is really confusing). Is there maybe like a Jackie Robinson of Hipsters I can talk to? Some guy that stormed onto a polo field and told all the yuppies that if they want to still be yuppies, they should at least pretend not to be ones. The irony of the hipster movement (which seems to be based on irony itself) is that it is rooted in going against the mainstream, but it became so popular; its now part of the main stream itself.
So of course, as it happens with every trend, we are currently in the inevitable backlash phase: where everyone runs around cursing everything hipster under and over their breath, including myself. There are websites dedicated to bashing them, late-night talk show jokes, primetime television shows mocking them, and what seems to be an overall disdain for all things hipster. Its actually pretty funny.
So being the The Contrarian I am, I had to dig a little bit deeper and really think about what is making people so mad, and what the hipster’s actual contributions to society has been. In doing so, I came to the conclusion that we should actually give hipsters a little f*ucking credit here, people! In defense of hipsters all over the would, I made a list of 7 (hipsters don’t like top-10-lists, too cliché) positive contributions hipster have (pretty much) taught society.
- 40’s the new 20!- I’ve never seen so many 38 years old men looking, acting, and dressing so darn cool. Its like finally we realized that after our 30th birthday, we don’t have to start acting like a complete pill the rest of our lives.
- Fresh Business- Hispter businesses are easily identifiable, whether it’s a new bar in your area with an odd beer selection and bocce ball, a coffee shop with drip coffee and loose leaf tea, a vintage store, bike shop or a dope little eatery with 4 1/2 tables and only 3 items on the menu.
- Social Change- I’m not sure that hipsters have actually ever lifted a finger to make a difference, but they sure have done a good job of making it “cool” to pretend to really care about equality and environmental change. It’s a start.
- Local Support- Horrible dive bar owners have undoubtedly noticed a spike in business. Lazy ass hipsters rather ride their fixed gears right up the street to a dingy bar with cheap drinks than cross a bridge or get on a freeway for a swanky ultra lounge. Local bars, restaurants, coffee shops, movie theaters, farmer’s markets and parks are now being revitalized and utilized. HELL YEAH!
- Tighter Jeans- Baggy jeans were just getting way out of control. Jeans don’t need to fit like spandex, but an overall national tightening of denim was much needed.
- Conservationism- It takes 12 minutes and an advanced degree just to know which bin to put your trash in these days. Whether its reducing waste, saving money, conserving energy, or recycling clothing, hipsters have made it cool to limit our carbon footprint. I’m down with that!
- Acceptance- Do you still collect Garbage Pail Kids? Wear raccoon tails? Grow miniature plants? Always have a horrible haircut? That’s all fine with hipster! Regardless of your race, religion, style, or culture, hipsters pretty much accept everyone. Actually, the more odd and random you are, the better.